Two summers ago, we went to Boston to visit my cousin, Melissa, and her family. Melissa's son, Evan, is Zachary's age and at the time was in love with the Knuffle Bunny books. Quickly our kids fell in love with them, too. For Christmas, Annalise decided that that was what she wanted to give to Zachary. She found the book and said, "I wish we could get him the doll, too. He would really love that." I humored her, thinking to myself, "We'll never find that doll." And of course, two seconds later, "There it is!" We were our local bookstore, which doesn't sell things like that. They sell books. And coffee. That's it. It was meant to be. We bought Knuffle Bunny, brought her home to Zachary, and the love story began.
Actually, it began slowly. He like Knuffle Bunny in the beginning. She slept with him at night, and cuddled with him when we read stories (sometimes). She was definitely number one in the stuffed animal queue, but she wasn't his constant companion. Now Knuffle Bunny goes with us on trips and errands. She gets buckled up in her own seat in the car when Zachary doesn't need to cuddle with her. She has her own wardrobe and her own personality and set of problems. Yesterday, Knuffle Bunny had a fever, so she couldn't come with us to take Zachary to school. She slept on her own bed (Juliette's changing table), where she would be more comfortable, wrapped in a blanket. The first thing Zachary asked when I picked him up was, "How is Knuffle feeling?" He checked on her right away and decided that she needed more rest. Last night she was feeling well enough to sleep with Zachary and when I came in this morning, his arms were wrapped around her tight!
I love that Zachary has a doll! He is such a masculine boy, SO full of testosterone, and has been since the very beginning. Knuffle Bunny has brought out such a sweet, caring, nurturing side of Zachary. (Honestly, so has Juliette, though. He really is VERY sweet with her.) I love this new side of my down and dirty boy. He is so much more complicated than we have given him credit for in the past. He's a real love, that one.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Girls Are Weird
Yesterday, the kids had a double play date over at our house. We decided to have an outdoor-only playdate because, well, we can (it's not raining! Yay!), but also because everyone is germy and borderline-sick, so we thought we'd minimize the germ-spreadage by keeping them all outside. It was great. They rode bikes and scooters, played with "swords", played on the sit upon spinny things, hid from one another, chased each other, etc. Juliette walked all over; played in the dirt; tried to get in the way of the bikes; layed down in the middle of the street. It was great.
At the end, the girls were playing with hula hoops. Annalise and Zachary just got hula hoops from my mom. My mom was buying one for herself and bought them for the kids as well. (Yes, you read that right. My mom bought HERSELF a hula hoop! She's 65 and she can still hula hoop like a rock star! According to my husband I look like Ozzy Osbourne when I hula hoop, so I guess I do, too. It's hard!!) Annalise has gotten quite good. She's confident and she whips that thing around. She almost knocked Juliette over the other day. A hula hoop can be dangerous. (I should have remembered this. "The Hula Hoop Incident" caused a trail of blood from my nose across the Paradise Canyon campus for years. It also covered my entire Brownie uniform. Deadly, those hula hoops.) Anyway, Annalise's BFF clearly hasn't had as much experience with the hula hoop, and so she wasn't as good. And that's when this weird thing happened.
They stopped hula hooping. When Annalise isn't good at something, she usually keeps going and going until she is. She taught herself to jump rope in one day. She's stubborn as hell (wonder where she gets that from?) and keeps trying and trying. But that's not what happened with BFF. But what's weird, is that it wasn't really BFF who stopped trying. It was Annalise who changed the activity. She saw that her friend wasn't doing as well and so she changed what she was doing. She started rolling the hula hoop. BFF immediately started rolling hers as well. And this was fine for a while until it was clear that Annalise was much better at rolling the hula hoop, too. So then she started messing up on purpose occasionally. And was saying weird things like, "Oh, I just got lucky that time. I'm not that good at it either. You're good, too." It was so weird. And then she got her condescending voice on, like she was an adult talking to a small child. "Good job! You did it!" It was like she was afraid to be good at something her friend wasn't. IT WAS SO WEIRD!
What's even weirder, is that I remember doing the same thing. Maybe I still do??? What is it with girls that we can't just be good at something and be good at it and that's it. Why does it have to be an issue. I remember lying about my grades to my friends because heaven forbid I did better than other people. I was SO SCARED to tell MY BFF (who was, admittedly, a scary person and SO not my BFF) that I got into UCSB. I knew that she hadn't heard yet and I didn't want to deal with that conversation. I remember downplaying my own strengths and boosting up others. Why do we do that? How does Annalise know to do this at the age of seven? Did I teach her that? God, I hope not! Is it something innate in women and girls that we are so sensitive to the feelings of others that it holds us back from our own successes? How do we counteract that? Of course I want Annalise to be sensitive to the feelings of others. That is one of her strengths. She has shown empathy from a way younger age than she should have been able to show such a thing. But is that holding her back from other strengths? How do we build our girls up without them feeling like they are keeping others down? In the long run, has this effected the success that I have had? Did I stifle my own talents when I was young and hence hold myself back from future success? I am so baffled by this. Maybe it's not everyone. Maybe it's just Weber girls? Does anyone else do this? The last thing I want is to have my daughter hold back on her own success on the hunch that it might make someone else "feel better." Annalise's BFF is one tough cookie. I seriously doubt she would be bothered by someone else doing better than her at something, especially when she has so many strengths herself. I am going to be seriously watching for this in the future; and watching what I do as well as my girls.
At the end, the girls were playing with hula hoops. Annalise and Zachary just got hula hoops from my mom. My mom was buying one for herself and bought them for the kids as well. (Yes, you read that right. My mom bought HERSELF a hula hoop! She's 65 and she can still hula hoop like a rock star! According to my husband I look like Ozzy Osbourne when I hula hoop, so I guess I do, too. It's hard!!) Annalise has gotten quite good. She's confident and she whips that thing around. She almost knocked Juliette over the other day. A hula hoop can be dangerous. (I should have remembered this. "The Hula Hoop Incident" caused a trail of blood from my nose across the Paradise Canyon campus for years. It also covered my entire Brownie uniform. Deadly, those hula hoops.) Anyway, Annalise's BFF clearly hasn't had as much experience with the hula hoop, and so she wasn't as good. And that's when this weird thing happened.
They stopped hula hooping. When Annalise isn't good at something, she usually keeps going and going until she is. She taught herself to jump rope in one day. She's stubborn as hell (wonder where she gets that from?) and keeps trying and trying. But that's not what happened with BFF. But what's weird, is that it wasn't really BFF who stopped trying. It was Annalise who changed the activity. She saw that her friend wasn't doing as well and so she changed what she was doing. She started rolling the hula hoop. BFF immediately started rolling hers as well. And this was fine for a while until it was clear that Annalise was much better at rolling the hula hoop, too. So then she started messing up on purpose occasionally. And was saying weird things like, "Oh, I just got lucky that time. I'm not that good at it either. You're good, too." It was so weird. And then she got her condescending voice on, like she was an adult talking to a small child. "Good job! You did it!" It was like she was afraid to be good at something her friend wasn't. IT WAS SO WEIRD!
What's even weirder, is that I remember doing the same thing. Maybe I still do??? What is it with girls that we can't just be good at something and be good at it and that's it. Why does it have to be an issue. I remember lying about my grades to my friends because heaven forbid I did better than other people. I was SO SCARED to tell MY BFF (who was, admittedly, a scary person and SO not my BFF) that I got into UCSB. I knew that she hadn't heard yet and I didn't want to deal with that conversation. I remember downplaying my own strengths and boosting up others. Why do we do that? How does Annalise know to do this at the age of seven? Did I teach her that? God, I hope not! Is it something innate in women and girls that we are so sensitive to the feelings of others that it holds us back from our own successes? How do we counteract that? Of course I want Annalise to be sensitive to the feelings of others. That is one of her strengths. She has shown empathy from a way younger age than she should have been able to show such a thing. But is that holding her back from other strengths? How do we build our girls up without them feeling like they are keeping others down? In the long run, has this effected the success that I have had? Did I stifle my own talents when I was young and hence hold myself back from future success? I am so baffled by this. Maybe it's not everyone. Maybe it's just Weber girls? Does anyone else do this? The last thing I want is to have my daughter hold back on her own success on the hunch that it might make someone else "feel better." Annalise's BFF is one tough cookie. I seriously doubt she would be bothered by someone else doing better than her at something, especially when she has so many strengths herself. I am going to be seriously watching for this in the future; and watching what I do as well as my girls.
Settings Changed
It has been brought to my attention that some people can't make comments on my blog. I changed the comments section so that "anyone" can comment. We'll see if this works. I am a computer moron and didn't even pay attention to any of that stuff. Please try to make a comment and we'll see if this works!! Thanks!
Friday, January 29, 2010
A Girls' Morning
Today was a rarity. Zachary had school, but Annalise was off. So we decided to go out to breakfast. My friend Sarah's mom came over to babysit for Juliette so that Annalise and I could really enjoy ourselves. And we did! With three, I feel like Annalise is sometimes the one who gets the shaft as far as alone time with me. Zachary and I get time during the mornings he's home when Juliette is sleeping. Obviously Juliette and I get time when the others are in school. But I have to make special arrangements to have one on one time with Annalise.
Seven is such an interesting age. She is on the verge of being very independent. She can do so much on her own and loves to have that independence. She will close her door now and turn up her music and hang out by herself or with a friend. She wants to do her own hair and pick out her own clothes. She can help her brother make his lunch. She will ride up ahead on her scooter to ride down the big hill by our house all by herself. But she also wants to come in and cuddle in the mornings and night. She still loves to play with dolls and Legos. And she is very silly! When I was her age, my friend, Sarah, and I walked to school all by ourselves. (Actually we walked all over town when we were supposed to be on our way to school, but that's another story for another day.) We rode our bikes to "The Plaza" (the Vons shopping center) every Saturday and stayed for hours. We were so independent. But I also remember going to camp at age nine and crying every night because I missed my mommy. Even today, Annalise was wearing her skinny jeans with her ballet flats (She's way more hip than I am.), but she skipped and held my hand as we walked into the restaraunt. It's definitely an age of contradictions.
So our breakfast today was a great check-in time. We talked about her plans to go to Stanford. (Have I mentioned that before? "I don't know why. I've just decided I want to go to Stanford." She'd better work on those soccer/dance/softball/ANYTHING skills that will get her a scholarship! The other night I woke up in a cold sweat when I realized that if Annalise is the same age Jason and I were when we got married, that we will have two kids in college at the same time as we're planning a wedding!! Yikes!!) Anyway, we talked about her college plans and how she wants to do a year abroad like Auntie Sarah did. Actually she's trying to talk me into doing a summer in Italy with Uncle Billy and Auntie Carlotta NEXT YEAR! Crazy girl! But we laughed and were silly and had a great time! My friend Courtney is having a girls' weekend in New York right now with her mom and sisters. I can't wait to have that with my girls! For now I will take these little opportunities for "big girl" time when they come. She's growing up before my eyes, and it's nice to stop and take it all in before the moment has passed.
Seven is such an interesting age. She is on the verge of being very independent. She can do so much on her own and loves to have that independence. She will close her door now and turn up her music and hang out by herself or with a friend. She wants to do her own hair and pick out her own clothes. She can help her brother make his lunch. She will ride up ahead on her scooter to ride down the big hill by our house all by herself. But she also wants to come in and cuddle in the mornings and night. She still loves to play with dolls and Legos. And she is very silly! When I was her age, my friend, Sarah, and I walked to school all by ourselves. (Actually we walked all over town when we were supposed to be on our way to school, but that's another story for another day.) We rode our bikes to "The Plaza" (the Vons shopping center) every Saturday and stayed for hours. We were so independent. But I also remember going to camp at age nine and crying every night because I missed my mommy. Even today, Annalise was wearing her skinny jeans with her ballet flats (She's way more hip than I am.), but she skipped and held my hand as we walked into the restaraunt. It's definitely an age of contradictions.
So our breakfast today was a great check-in time. We talked about her plans to go to Stanford. (Have I mentioned that before? "I don't know why. I've just decided I want to go to Stanford." She'd better work on those soccer/dance/softball/ANYTHING skills that will get her a scholarship! The other night I woke up in a cold sweat when I realized that if Annalise is the same age Jason and I were when we got married, that we will have two kids in college at the same time as we're planning a wedding!! Yikes!!) Anyway, we talked about her college plans and how she wants to do a year abroad like Auntie Sarah did. Actually she's trying to talk me into doing a summer in Italy with Uncle Billy and Auntie Carlotta NEXT YEAR! Crazy girl! But we laughed and were silly and had a great time! My friend Courtney is having a girls' weekend in New York right now with her mom and sisters. I can't wait to have that with my girls! For now I will take these little opportunities for "big girl" time when they come. She's growing up before my eyes, and it's nice to stop and take it all in before the moment has passed.
Roasted Broccoli
I was watching some cooking show recently (maybe the Barefoot Contessa? I don't remember). Anyway, she made roasted broccoli. So I decided to try it. My kids are pretty good vegetable eaters, but not really by choice. They will eat raw red peppers and mushrooms (Zachary) and raw carrots (Annalise) in addition to frozen peas (still frozen) til the cows come home. But they sometimes take a little coaxing to eat green veggies. So I tried this and they LOVED it!! And by loved, I mean LOVED! Zachary said, "I can't believe my LIFE! This is SO good!" Annalise said they tasted like a chip, only saltier. (They only had a sprinkling of salt, too!) Both asked for more and we actually ran out of seconds. Usually I am eating all the broccoli left in the bowl, but that night I didn't get any seconds! Last night we tried it with asparagus with equal success. It may take more vitamins out of the veggies than just steaming (I don't know), but I'm not sure how much I care at this point! And, it was SO easy! Here's all I did:
Roasted Broccoli
cut up broccoli pieces
drizzle of olive oil
sprinkling of salt
sprinkling of pepper
Put the broccoli on a baking sheet. Drizzle with olive oil. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Stir it all together to coat. Place in a 350 degree oven for about 20 minutes. Stir or shake the pan every 7-10 minutes and remove from oven when it starts to get brown in parts. Or just taste a bit and see if you like it. It's not an exact science. (For asparagus, I cut the asparagus spears into bite size pieces and then did the same thing.) Enjoy!
Roasted Broccoli
cut up broccoli pieces
drizzle of olive oil
sprinkling of salt
sprinkling of pepper
Put the broccoli on a baking sheet. Drizzle with olive oil. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Stir it all together to coat. Place in a 350 degree oven for about 20 minutes. Stir or shake the pan every 7-10 minutes and remove from oven when it starts to get brown in parts. Or just taste a bit and see if you like it. It's not an exact science. (For asparagus, I cut the asparagus spears into bite size pieces and then did the same thing.) Enjoy!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
One Year!
Yesterday Miss Juliette Camille turned one year old! How this year has flown! I know it sounds cliche, but it really does seem like just yesterday when we were in that delivery room, watching the inauguration, anticipating her arrival. And now here we are, a year later, and she is no longer the same helpless, tiny creature we joyously welcomed into our arms.
At one, Juliette is a force! She was an early, confident mover and now she is an early, confident runner! One of her favorite things is sneaking away from us (down the hall, for example), and running and squealing as we swoop in to round her up. She doesn't really say many "real" words; just mama, dada, mimi (our word for nursing) and nana (night night). And she can also sign mimis, all done, water and more. She enthusiasticly shows off her clapping and waving skills and loves to shake her head no as she reaches for something she knows she's not supposed to have. She is an emptier of cupboards and a stealer of her siblings' toys, homework, socks, lunchboxes, etc. She loves babies and dollies. She has latched onto one of Annalise's old dolls, stripped it of its clothes and now drags it with her wherever she goes. "Dirty Dolly" cuddles with her when she sleeps and she loves to give her cuddles, hugs, kisses and pats on the back. She loves her family! She squeals with delight and dances up and down when Daddy comes home at night. She loves to wrestle with Zachary. She is constantly trying to get into Annalise's room (especially when Annalise is already in bed!) to be with her. She reaches out of my arms to have Grandma hold her. Hardly ever does anyone turn her away! She is a huge flirt and quick to make friends. She is the kind of baby who everyone in the grocery store wants to talk to and Juliette is happy to oblige with a little peek-a-boo or playing hard to get. She has a beautiful, genuine smile that lights up a room.
It's hard to imagine life without her. Did we actually have a debate about having a third child? What were we thinking? The decision seems so easy now. Life with Juliette is so much richer, filled with so much more joy. She makes us laugh and smile. She challenges us. She fills our lives with love and joy.
At one, Juliette is a force! She was an early, confident mover and now she is an early, confident runner! One of her favorite things is sneaking away from us (down the hall, for example), and running and squealing as we swoop in to round her up. She doesn't really say many "real" words; just mama, dada, mimi (our word for nursing) and nana (night night). And she can also sign mimis, all done, water and more. She enthusiasticly shows off her clapping and waving skills and loves to shake her head no as she reaches for something she knows she's not supposed to have. She is an emptier of cupboards and a stealer of her siblings' toys, homework, socks, lunchboxes, etc. She loves babies and dollies. She has latched onto one of Annalise's old dolls, stripped it of its clothes and now drags it with her wherever she goes. "Dirty Dolly" cuddles with her when she sleeps and she loves to give her cuddles, hugs, kisses and pats on the back. She loves her family! She squeals with delight and dances up and down when Daddy comes home at night. She loves to wrestle with Zachary. She is constantly trying to get into Annalise's room (especially when Annalise is already in bed!) to be with her. She reaches out of my arms to have Grandma hold her. Hardly ever does anyone turn her away! She is a huge flirt and quick to make friends. She is the kind of baby who everyone in the grocery store wants to talk to and Juliette is happy to oblige with a little peek-a-boo or playing hard to get. She has a beautiful, genuine smile that lights up a room.
It's hard to imagine life without her. Did we actually have a debate about having a third child? What were we thinking? The decision seems so easy now. Life with Juliette is so much richer, filled with so much more joy. She makes us laugh and smile. She challenges us. She fills our lives with love and joy.
Friday, January 15, 2010
One of Those Days
Do you ever have one of those days? I swear, yesterday was one of those days that if I were a single mom, I swear I would have hanged myself. It was a tough day, but I've had tougher. But for some reason yesterday, I just couldn't take it anymore. I went to bad angry and woke up this morning angry, too. What right do I have to be angry? Look at my life! It's pretty damn good. But some days URRRFFF!! I just want to scream!!
To start, Annalise had been sick all week. And when one of them is stuck inside all week, that means all of them are stuck inside all week. Correction, all of US are stuck inside all week. And a four year old boy stuck inside all week is not good. So Zachary had TWO temper tantrums yesterday. TWO! And major ones too. So much so that the child has lost his voice today. He has no voice. That's how much screaming was happening in our house yesterday. And Juliette, bless her, is systematically emptying out every single cabinet in the house. There is stuff EVERYWHERE!! I can't walk without tripping on something. I have Splenda packets in my bedroom and tampons in the living room. The granola bars are totally mashed and raisins are permanently imbedded in the carpet. And let's not even mention the cereal. The problem is, that I cannot get anything done unless she is occupied. And the only thing that seems to keep her occupied are Legos (which we try to avoid at all costs. I'm tired of fishing those out of her mouth.) and kitchen and bathroom cabinets. We've babylocked everything that is potentially dangerous to her, but that doesn't stop the mess. Why isn't that kid amused by baby toys? They're fun! They're bright! They're throwable! Totally uninterested. And then by the end of the evening I couldn't put her down without her crying. And since I already had to listen to Zachary crying, I just didn't want to listen to her, too. Remarkably the sick one held up the best.
I think the problem with yesterday wasn't just the temper tantrums and the stuff everywhere, it was my attitude toward it all. I've had a whole week with absolutely not a second to myself. (Well, that's not entirely true. I did have one afternoon where they all either rested or napped at the same time. But then I was writing thank you notes. I don't think that counts as alone time.) I think if I don't have any time to myself for a whole week then I go crazy. So, the lesson is... if I have a sick kid or another time like this when they are all here 24/7, I need to find some way to get some time to myself. A friend wrote me an email this morning talking me down off the fence and saying how we all have days like this. I know we do, but it was a great reminder. I really needed that. So if you are having a day like I had yesterday (or if in the future you do -- and you know you will), remember that I've been there, too. We all have. And a good night's sleep (if you can get it), two kids in school and one down for a nap makes the world a whole lot better. And if you don't have that break, then call me up. We'll commiserate and find a solution. Today, things are not that bad.
To start, Annalise had been sick all week. And when one of them is stuck inside all week, that means all of them are stuck inside all week. Correction, all of US are stuck inside all week. And a four year old boy stuck inside all week is not good. So Zachary had TWO temper tantrums yesterday. TWO! And major ones too. So much so that the child has lost his voice today. He has no voice. That's how much screaming was happening in our house yesterday. And Juliette, bless her, is systematically emptying out every single cabinet in the house. There is stuff EVERYWHERE!! I can't walk without tripping on something. I have Splenda packets in my bedroom and tampons in the living room. The granola bars are totally mashed and raisins are permanently imbedded in the carpet. And let's not even mention the cereal. The problem is, that I cannot get anything done unless she is occupied. And the only thing that seems to keep her occupied are Legos (which we try to avoid at all costs. I'm tired of fishing those out of her mouth.) and kitchen and bathroom cabinets. We've babylocked everything that is potentially dangerous to her, but that doesn't stop the mess. Why isn't that kid amused by baby toys? They're fun! They're bright! They're throwable! Totally uninterested. And then by the end of the evening I couldn't put her down without her crying. And since I already had to listen to Zachary crying, I just didn't want to listen to her, too. Remarkably the sick one held up the best.
I think the problem with yesterday wasn't just the temper tantrums and the stuff everywhere, it was my attitude toward it all. I've had a whole week with absolutely not a second to myself. (Well, that's not entirely true. I did have one afternoon where they all either rested or napped at the same time. But then I was writing thank you notes. I don't think that counts as alone time.) I think if I don't have any time to myself for a whole week then I go crazy. So, the lesson is... if I have a sick kid or another time like this when they are all here 24/7, I need to find some way to get some time to myself. A friend wrote me an email this morning talking me down off the fence and saying how we all have days like this. I know we do, but it was a great reminder. I really needed that. So if you are having a day like I had yesterday (or if in the future you do -- and you know you will), remember that I've been there, too. We all have. And a good night's sleep (if you can get it), two kids in school and one down for a nap makes the world a whole lot better. And if you don't have that break, then call me up. We'll commiserate and find a solution. Today, things are not that bad.
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